had enough.

i feel as though im leading a double life. my ED life and my normal life. im sick of lying to people.sick of pretending im OK,sick of secretly counting calories,and weighing myself. exercising.coming on here and writing everything down,logging onto Ana websites.
i wanna tell somebody about my ED but i just cant.
i wish i could just wake up in the morning and feel normal for once.
i dont know why im writing this, i just feel so though.
sick of hiding.

FATTTYYYY

food intake today..
a large sausage roll
packet of crisps
Bacon sandwich
2 chocolate bars
mash potatoe and chicken
1 chocolate biscuit

FAT COW.

this week.

this week,i have doctors tomorrow and my driving test thursday!
im so stressed and nervous!
wish me luck!!!
xoxo

the new dress

my extra small dress.

XS

i bought an extra small dress today and it fits :D pic will be up tomorrow...so happy right now...!!!

i give up.

simple.

i hate the fact that im getting worse,i was trying to recover,now im making myself more sick.
i cant stand to see my fat ugly face and body in the mirror now.i cant even bring myself to eat during the day now,i cant eat in front of anyone but my own family. i cry myself to sleep. i cry over any little thing. im depressed again.
my cousin has gone away for 2 weeks,i cant cope without a text or a phone call,i rely on her for. i dont talk to her about my issues,i gave up talking to her,when i made her cry one evening telling her how i felt. she just makes me feel a little better when i speak to her!

im a fucking joke.
im a mess.
im a failure.